Redemption Song

Several moons ago, I bought a few boxes/tins of 2007 Sweet Spot. It wasn’t my favorite product of all time, but it was absurdly discounted in the tail end of the holiday shopping season. In one tin, I pulled the dreaded white card of doom. You know the sort. It’s just as thick as a major hit but it’s completely blank save a plain text sticker and silver rub off. Great…

I redeemed the code for my “ALAN BRANCH/LEON HALL 2007 SWEET SPOT FOOTBALL SWEET SPOT PIGSKIN DUAL SIGNATURES # ED TO 50 PDS-AL” and hoped for the best. A while later, I received an email from Upper Deck stating they could not fulfill the redemption for whatever reason but that I could request a substitute (another song reference!). I replied that I really only collect Emmitt Smith but since I highly doubt they would consider his autograph a replacement of “equal value,” they could send whatever they felt inclined to mail. It was a risk, but it wasn’t like I was due a cut 1/1 auto from Hognus Wagner or Abe Lincoln’s pubes.

Just the other day I received an asbestos-laden envelope from none other than 5909 Sea Otter Place in Carlsbad. I doubt it’s actually asbestos, but really, what kind of envelopes do they use in CA? Have they never heard of bubble mailers? I digress. Inside, I found a toploader and letter. I actually read the letter first which stated:

PLEASE READ

Dear Valued Upper Deck Collector,

   Congratulations on finding your redemption card. Please look on the front of the package for the redemption code(s) that are being replaced. We appreciate your patience and support of our redemption process. Upon request we have exchanged your card according to the policy in place on redemption offers for other comparable pieces. Please be assured that Upper Deck strives to produce the finest, high quality trading card products and memorabilia. We hope you enjoy this exchange item and hope it finds a cherished place in your collection.

Sincerely,

The Upper Deck Company

That’s nice. With key words like “congratulations,” “support,” “enjoy,” and “cherished,” I feel all warm and fuzzy inside having received this exchanged redemption card 7+ months after redeeming the code for a product that was already 2+ years old (although I will say at least it didn’t take as long as my second most recent redemption saga). I’m also a huge fan of the all caps “PLEASE READ” heading. What else would I do with a letter? I guess I would have been more confused if it had read “PLEASE EAT” or “PLEASE SNIFF”. Anywho, so what did I wind up with for my Alan Branch/Leon Hall dual auto? This bad boy:

2009 Philadelphia Signatures Eli Manning

Not exactly a dual pigskin rookie autograph card, but uh…it’ll do.

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7 Responses to Redemption Song

  1. jswaykos says:

    What’s a bubble mailer?

  2. CPAdave says:

    It’s a great big plastic capsule into which you put all of your items, along with a large candle. The heat from the candle lifts the bubble mailer high above civilization as we know it. Along the way, a carrier pigeon grabs the handle at the top, reads the address, and safely delivers the entire package to the intended recipient.

    Geez. I thought you Californians were supposed to be on the cutting edge of things…

  3. not too bad….

  4. What if it said “PLEASE SNIFF” or “PLEASE EAT”…AND had Abe Lincoln’s pubes in it? I would be scared. Not that the pubes were in there, but that they still smelled or had flavor after all these years.

    Wait…what was this post about?

    Oh, yeah. Nice Elu Mawg signature.

  5. Tim Hertzog says:

    Say Dave…..Would that be up for trade?

  6. SeaOtter Insider says:

    Considering that UD has laid off nearly all of it’s employees, I’d consider yourself lucky to get your redemption at all. And all that dust you got, it’s probably from shredding all the counterfeit YuGiOh! and unsellable non-licensed MLB cards left in the empty warehouse.

  7. CPAdave says:

    @Tim, I thought of you as soon as I saw this card. Email your address to me (I might have it somewhere but who knows where) and it’s yours. If I remember correctly, a certain someone sent me a Troy Aikman auto a while back, so we’ll call it even Steven.

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